Funny Little Mistake
by xJojoIsHerex
Summary: Bored and drunk, Jess has a fling. A year later, a six month old baby turns up on his doorstep. After three days, an exhausted and sleep deprived Jess, half covered in baby talc, goes to Luke and, inevitably Lorelai, for help. Only rated T because I'm paranoid. Literati mentions but no action as yet. Luke/Lorelai. Set post season finale. Please review! My first GG fic! :)


Chapter 1

Jess sat down at the bar. He'd heard that Rory had broken up with that stuck up boyfriend of her's, Logan and, still not completely over her, he had started to Star's Hollow to win her back but found out that she'd gone on a trip, following Barack Obama around the country.

Now, he was at a bar somewhere outside of New York, bored and a bit low. He noticed a girl sit down at the bar out of the corner of his eye. Jess looked up at her over his glass of whiskey. She was pretty enough; chocolate brown hair just brushing her shoulders, lighter brown eyes, slim curves, red lips, blah blah blah. At this point, Jess didn't really care much what she looked like. He downed his glass of whiskey and pulled a face (why do people drink whiskey? It is disgusting!) before walking over to the girl and asking her name.

Hours later, Jess woke with a pounding head ache.

"Never again." He muttered, sitting up on his bed. It was then that he noticed the girl lying next to him. He jumped and swore.

He looked around the room, taking in the clothes lying on the floor, red lipstick stains on the covers, and were those his boxers on the ceiling fan?!

The girl woke up when she heard him curse and sat up also.

"Oh no!" She said. She scrambled out of the bed and grabbed her clothes. She pulled them on as fast as she could.

"Wait!" Jess said quickly when she made for the door. She looked back quickly, scowled at him and opened it.

"I'm-" The door slammed behind the girl."Sorry..." He sighed and then got up to start trying to get his underwear down from the ceiling.

One year, three months, two weeks and six days later...

Jess put his hammer down in triumph as he finally finished nailing up the last picture in his new apartment. His book was getting popular, the third New York Times best seller so now he was able to buy the bottom floor apartment in Manhattan. He looked at the picture proudly, a copy of some Monet painting, Jess had forgotten which one it was. The door buzzer made him turn.

He went and opened the door.

A very angry looking woman was standing there, carrying a baby in her arms.

"Hi." Jess said curiously, having no idea who she was.

"YOU," The girl said angrily, shoving the baby into his arms along with some papers, "Are a jerk!"

And she turned and stormed away.

Jess stared after her in confusion.

"I'm not a jerk," He looked at the baby. "Am I?"

"Guh..." It said, looking up at him with big green eyes.

"Exactly." He said and closed the door.

"Okay..." Jess exhaled slowly, sitting down on the leather couch.

He looked at the sheets of paper. One of them was a birth certificate. Her name, Charlotte Holly Mariano. Father, himself. That sent a shot of fear mixed with panic through him. Mother, Catherine Amy Law. So that's who she was, he thought.

"So you're a girl?" He said to the baby in a yellow baby-gro.

She looked at him as if to say, "Yes, of course!"

"Charlotte, I hate that name. What about... Charlie?" He suggested.

She clapped her tiny hands together as if she were applauding his choice.

"Born June 17th. So you're six months old. Aren't you kinda small for that age?" He remembered that his half-sister had been much bigger at six months of age.

"Born prematurely by five weeks." He read off of a medical form.

He found an official looking paper saying that he had full custody of Charlie. He swallowed nervously, trying to keep the curses he wanted to say down.

He'd got letters about a court case, which he now knew was about Charlie but at the time he had no idea and thought it was a mistake.

Amongst the papers there was a passport, medical journal, and a dummy.

When Charlie saw it, she cried out and reached for it.

"Okay." Jess said as he uncertainly put it into her mouth.

She sucked on it happily.

It didn't keep her entertained for long though. As Jess was getting a sandwich for himself and a banana for her, she crawled underneath the table in the living room. He came back in to find her missing from sight.

Panicked, he called. "Charlie?"

Giggling answered him.

He followed it to where she was hiding, playing with some wires from the tv.

"There you are." He said, relieved. He picked her up and held her so they were looking straight at each other. "Don't do that, okay? We're going to have to work this out together, me and you."

Charlie poked his cheek by way of agreement.

He took her into the kitchen and sat her down, putting boxes left over from moving around her to stop he from falling off the chair. He put the plate of mashed up banana in front her along with a teaspoon and ate his own sandwich. Charlie picked up the spoon and hit it against the boxes, laughing at the sounds it made.

Jess sighed and took the spoon from her carefully. He started to feed her the banana.

"How can you eat this stuff? It's gross." He said, leaning his hand against his chin as he spooned it into her mouth. Charlie smiled in response.

Jess went into his study and started trying to do some work on his next book. He'd left Charlie in front of the tv, an animated kid's movie on.

No more than five minutes had passed when he heard a crash from the next room. Hurrying in, he found Charlie crawling around, the remains of a glass jar scattered on the floor. He picked her up quickly, checking her over for any cuts. Fortunately, she was fine. He put her on his bed, pillows and clothes around the edges in case she fell, and cleared up the glass. His house was totally not baby proofed.

He'd had to take her out, buy her proper baby stuff. Jesse went to his laptop and did some research.

The website he found said the number one thing was to never leave the baby unattended unless you were 100% it was completely safe or asleep. He went into his room to find Charlie asleep on her front. He sighed out of relief and continue down the page.

Jess walked into the shop, carrying Charlie with one arm. He walked over to the baby aisle and looked around.

"Better get you a pram. I can't carry you around like this all the time." He said to Charlie.

She giggled in agreement.

"You like this one?" He asked, pointing to a pink one.

Charlie waved her hands behind him. He spun around and saw a purple pram, decorated with white flowers.

"You sure?"

Charlie reached for it.

"Okay then. I'll get it." Jess said.

Twenty minutes later, Jess sat on the floor surrounded by pieces of the pram. He groaned and hit his hands against his forehead.

"How the hell am I supposed to put this thing together? It's like a freaking mosaic or something and the instruction manual is in Swedish!" He complained.

Charlie crawled around through the pieces, picking one of them up and putting it in her mouth.

"Don't..." Jess sighed, taking it from her.

He eventually managed to put the pram together with the help of a YouTube video.

He strapped Charlie in proudly and walked her towards a shop. Several women stopped to coo at her and say how adorable she was.

"Oh she's gorgeous! Is she yours?" One asked, smiling at Jess.

"Uh, yeah she is." He said, a little awkward at all this attention. "At least, I think so." He added under his breath.

"That's so sweet." The woman smiled and simpered.

"Yeah, well, we've got to go buy stuff... so see you." He said hurriedly and walked away, pushing Charlie in front of him.

It was true then, babies really are chick magnets, Jess thought uncomfortably.


End file.
